This comes from the magical tournament known as the FA Cup, wherein EVERY SINGLE PROFESSIONAL SOCCER TEAM IN ENGLAND starts out with a chance to be champion.
A man whose family is named after a castrated male cow, Rene Steer toils along in complete obscurity, six leagues removed from the fame and glory of the Premier League.
But this doesn't mean that he can't play. Check out this fucking howitzer, as he comes in nearly undetected from the side of the screen and pulverizes the ball off the underside of the bar. I can only imagine what Ray Hudson would have to say about this goal.
Thursday, October 3, 2013
Wednesday, October 2, 2013
The Inigo Martinez Speculative Rip of the Week: Hisato Sato
This week's effort comes from the land of the rising sun. Megastar Hisato Sato lets this ball sink over his right shoulder, only to swivel and fire a topsin screamer into the far top 90. Outrageous goal.
Tuesday, October 1, 2013
My Thoughts on TV
I have two problems with scripted television, and they are interrelated.
First, I think that scripted TV is entirely too pervasive in our society.
Second, I think that people who watch extensive amounts of scripted TV are wasting their lives.
Let me explain.
I basically only use television to watch sports. I'm not going to lie, I look down on people who are obsessive TV watchers. The fact that millions of people sit in front of a screen for hours at a time and fill their brains with the thoughts and actions of other people, all of whom are acting (whether or not their actions are purported to be "real") is, to me, deplorable. You only get one life. You'll never be as young as you are RIGHT NOW, at THIS MOMENT. You don't get this moment back.
It's hard enough for me to drag myself to work every day, knowing that I'll sit in front of a computer for eight hours when I could be outside exploring some new neighborhood, taking a last walk with my dog before the fall turns to winter, or literally doing anything else.
St. Ignatius, the patron saint of Boston College (I'm not exactly sure how patron saints work, I'm not Catholic), echoed Plato's assertion that the unexamined life is not worth living. Examine your own life, not those of fake people who are the product of a man's imagination. Millions go home every day eager to fall onto their couches and watch characters who, in many cases, have a more pronounced hold on the viewer's emotional state than some family members. This is simply wrong. Don't give your own, actual, tangible life away for the promise of entertainment at the foot of some monolithic fiction factory.
Of course, this all sounds hypocritical, since I could spend entire days (and indeed have) reading fiction books. And again, fictional entertainment in all forms has existed since the invention of language. But my outrage is not directed towards any level of consumption, nor towards any media type. Rather, it is aimed at the people who use fictional television (or books, or video games, etc) as a way to pass the time - a way to spend valuable hours that they will never recover doing something that gives them no benefit except the empty, unrequited relationship between viewer and character and the cultural capital to hold essentially pointless conversations with others of their ilk.
Every form of media is a product of the society in which it was conceived. Great art is a reflection, and often a criticism, of its culture. The people who consume fiction and have the wherewithal to understand this concept, and to internalize and converse with others about the lessons/ideals/values/maxims that this fiction is trying to convey, are not the people that I'm worried about. It's the others. The people who veg out, content to let an endless parade of fictional characters shepherd them from young adulthood to the grave, content with being passively entertained, content with living an unexamined life.
First, I think that scripted TV is entirely too pervasive in our society.
Second, I think that people who watch extensive amounts of scripted TV are wasting their lives.
Let me explain.
I basically only use television to watch sports. I'm not going to lie, I look down on people who are obsessive TV watchers. The fact that millions of people sit in front of a screen for hours at a time and fill their brains with the thoughts and actions of other people, all of whom are acting (whether or not their actions are purported to be "real") is, to me, deplorable. You only get one life. You'll never be as young as you are RIGHT NOW, at THIS MOMENT. You don't get this moment back.
It's hard enough for me to drag myself to work every day, knowing that I'll sit in front of a computer for eight hours when I could be outside exploring some new neighborhood, taking a last walk with my dog before the fall turns to winter, or literally doing anything else.
St. Ignatius, the patron saint of Boston College (I'm not exactly sure how patron saints work, I'm not Catholic), echoed Plato's assertion that the unexamined life is not worth living. Examine your own life, not those of fake people who are the product of a man's imagination. Millions go home every day eager to fall onto their couches and watch characters who, in many cases, have a more pronounced hold on the viewer's emotional state than some family members. This is simply wrong. Don't give your own, actual, tangible life away for the promise of entertainment at the foot of some monolithic fiction factory.
Of course, this all sounds hypocritical, since I could spend entire days (and indeed have) reading fiction books. And again, fictional entertainment in all forms has existed since the invention of language. But my outrage is not directed towards any level of consumption, nor towards any media type. Rather, it is aimed at the people who use fictional television (or books, or video games, etc) as a way to pass the time - a way to spend valuable hours that they will never recover doing something that gives them no benefit except the empty, unrequited relationship between viewer and character and the cultural capital to hold essentially pointless conversations with others of their ilk.
Every form of media is a product of the society in which it was conceived. Great art is a reflection, and often a criticism, of its culture. The people who consume fiction and have the wherewithal to understand this concept, and to internalize and converse with others about the lessons/ideals/values/maxims that this fiction is trying to convey, are not the people that I'm worried about. It's the others. The people who veg out, content to let an endless parade of fictional characters shepherd them from young adulthood to the grave, content with being passively entertained, content with living an unexamined life.
Tuesday, September 17, 2013
Well, That Didn't Last Long
Sorry, Arkadiusz. Your time atop the standings has been cut short by an ABSOLUTE THUNDERBOLT.
Ladies and gentlemen, Sivasspor's Manuel da Costa.
Bring the rain.
Ladies and gentlemen, Sivasspor's Manuel da Costa.
Bring the rain.
The Inigo Martinez Speculative Rip of the Week: Arkadiusz Piech
WHO????
Arkadiusz Piech, that's who.
I had never heard of him, either. Mainly because he plays for Zaglebie Lubin, a (Wikipedia....) top-level Polish professional team based in the undoubtedly historic and prosperous city of Lubin.
Anyway, the guy sees a defender in front of him and, rather than try anything strange like passing or dribbling around him, he just uncorks a long-range missile attack into the back of the onion bag. Good on ya, Arkadiusz. Early contender for Name of the Year.
Arkadiusz Piech, that's who.
I had never heard of him, either. Mainly because he plays for Zaglebie Lubin, a (Wikipedia....) top-level Polish professional team based in the undoubtedly historic and prosperous city of Lubin.
Anyway, the guy sees a defender in front of him and, rather than try anything strange like passing or dribbling around him, he just uncorks a long-range missile attack into the back of the onion bag. Good on ya, Arkadiusz. Early contender for Name of the Year.
Wednesday, September 4, 2013
The Inigo Martinez Speculative Rip of the Week: Benny Feilhaber
An absolute peach of a goal from former USMNT/ New England Revolution player Benny Feilhaber. Kids, that's the way you pull off the outside of the foot half-volley.
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
I'm Getting Kind of Worried About the Environment
Not a new subject. Everywhere you turn, there's another study/article/blog post/news item/massive fundraiser. Basically, we're destroying the only planet that we're able to live on because we've created a lifestyle that demands machines with extraordinarily high levels of carbon dioxide emissions.
This is changing the chemical makeup of our atmosphere to such a degree that the average air temperature is heating up.
This in turn makes ice melt in large quantities and seawater expand as it warms.
Which directly contributes to more (and more violent) storms, rising sea levels, and unpredictable weather conditions.
We know this.
The question is, what do we do?
Now, on a large scale, I have no idea. I'm not a scientist or politician or mover and shaker of millions of people.
But I read a quote from someone somewhere (that's how all inspiring quotes are attributed these days) that said something like: "Just because you only make a small difference does not give you an excuse to do nothing."
We can't expect to just wait around doing the same shit every day, wasting electricity/water/gas, and then have some celebrity coalition or summit of multibillionaires decide to swoop in and save the world. It's not going to happen like that.
It's the most cliched thing in the world, but it's true. We need to change the way we act in a bunch of small ways every day. If you do a little bit, and you tell your friends to do a little bit, and they pass it along, eventually most people will be imperceptibly contributing to the planet's health, instead of its destruction.
What do we do? Simple shit. Don't drink out of plastic water bottles. Turn lights off when you leave the room. Unplug your phone/computer charger when you're not using it. Don't drive like a fucking maniac with your foot stapled to the floor. Don't sing the entirety of "Bohemian Rhapsody" in the shower.
To be a bit over-the-top for a second, the Earth is dying. No, wait, let me rephrase that, because it's not a passive thing. We are killing the Earth. It's not going to stop any time soon, but we can slow it down in a million ways every day. Just keep it in the back of your mind as you're going through your day.
It's important.
This is changing the chemical makeup of our atmosphere to such a degree that the average air temperature is heating up.
This in turn makes ice melt in large quantities and seawater expand as it warms.
Which directly contributes to more (and more violent) storms, rising sea levels, and unpredictable weather conditions.
We know this.
The question is, what do we do?
Now, on a large scale, I have no idea. I'm not a scientist or politician or mover and shaker of millions of people.
But I read a quote from someone somewhere (that's how all inspiring quotes are attributed these days) that said something like: "Just because you only make a small difference does not give you an excuse to do nothing."
We can't expect to just wait around doing the same shit every day, wasting electricity/water/gas, and then have some celebrity coalition or summit of multibillionaires decide to swoop in and save the world. It's not going to happen like that.
It's the most cliched thing in the world, but it's true. We need to change the way we act in a bunch of small ways every day. If you do a little bit, and you tell your friends to do a little bit, and they pass it along, eventually most people will be imperceptibly contributing to the planet's health, instead of its destruction.
What do we do? Simple shit. Don't drink out of plastic water bottles. Turn lights off when you leave the room. Unplug your phone/computer charger when you're not using it. Don't drive like a fucking maniac with your foot stapled to the floor. Don't sing the entirety of "Bohemian Rhapsody" in the shower.
To be a bit over-the-top for a second, the Earth is dying. No, wait, let me rephrase that, because it's not a passive thing. We are killing the Earth. It's not going to stop any time soon, but we can slow it down in a million ways every day. Just keep it in the back of your mind as you're going through your day.
It's important.
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